15 DEFINITE SIGNS HE IS CHEATING ON YOU

15 Definite Signs He’s Cheating On You


Cheating is generally considered the ultimate betrayal and the most difficult issue to bounce back from in a relationship. This is because trust is so critical … it’s the foundation a relationship is built on. If you can’t trust a man to be honest with you, then everything else you try to build together will just fall apart.

It’s natural not to want to admit it could be happening to you, so you may ignore the signs. Or maybe the signs are there and you’re willing to see them, but you don’t even know what to look for.

On the other hand, if you’ve been cheated on before and this is a major issue for you, you may know the signs all too well. This can be a good thing because you’ll be able to recognize what’s going on quickly and get out, or it can be a bad thing because you’re hypersensitive and zeroing in on non-issues because of the trauma in your past, so insecurity and paranoia take over.

MORE: The Real Reason Men Cheat 

Sometimes it helps to set aside your emotions as much as possible. Maybe that means temporarily letting go of your fear that you could lose everything you have with him if you’re right, or your anxiety that it could be happening to you all over again. Set aside those feelings for just a minute and look logically at his behavior, and you can get to the answer you need.

One or two of these signs might not mean anything, but if they start piling up, you need to take the possibility that he might be cheating on you very seriously.

Here Are 15 Signs Your Man Might Be Cheating On You:

1. He’s on his phone or online more than usual

 

If he’s suddenly glued to his phone, watch out. This is a major concern, especially if he’s sneaky about it. If he doesn’t tell you who he’s talking to or what he’s doing and gets mad if you ask him or happen to glance at his phone, this is a red flag.

A man who’s 100% into the relationship and doesn’t have another woman in the mix will have nothing to hide. He won’t be constantly texting someone else and acting funny about it.

If you feel like his attention is always elsewhere, either directed at his phone or the computer, then he could be connecting with someone else online. If he acts defensive about it, won’t tell you more, and tries to hide it from you, this is a sign he’s cheating or about to cheat.

2. Cares about his appearance much more than usual

If he suddenly takes a renewed interest in his appearance when you’re in an established relationship, he’s probably not trying to impress you.

Has he joined a gym out of the blue? Is he trying to lose weight? If he never had an interest in working out before, he could be preening to try to attract someone new.

Is he trying out a more updated hairstyle? Shopping for new clothes and dressing differently? Maybe wearing a different cologne, one you didn’t choose for him?

These are all common behaviors of men when they’re trying to attract women (you may remember some of them from when you first started dating him!) and don’t really mesh with how a guy acts when he’s already in an established relationship.

Is it possible he just wants to feel good about himself and maybe impress you? Yes, of course. You can’t take any of these signs in a vacuum. You need to take the whole picture into account.

MORE: How to Tell If Your Boyfriend is Cheating on You

3.  He’s suddenly very busy with work

If he suddenly has to travel out of town more frequently, or he’s having a lot more late nights at the office, it could be cause for concern.

If he’s recently been promoted or his job has changed somehow, this might not be something to worry about. But if you know that’s not the case and he’s exhibiting some of the other signs here as well, it’s a definite cause for concern.

Is he going out after work more frequently for happy hours with people from the office? If there’s a new woman at work this could be a way for him to spend time with her off the clock and away from the office, to get to know her on a more personal level. If he never went to work happy hours before and suddenly starts going regularly, it could be a sign he’s testing the waters to cheat.

It’s also possible he’s using “work” as a cover for whatever he’s out there doing. Saying you have to work is a tough excuse to argue with.

MORE: Why Do Guys Cheat? 

4. He avoids intimacy with you

This is not the same as avoiding sex, this is about demonstrating affectionate and loving behavior.

If a man is cheating because he’s in love with someone new, it could make him feel like he’s cheating on his new love with you if he’s affectionate and loving with both of you, especially if he’s a loyal guy by nature and cheating is something new for him.

Even if he’s not in love with the person he’s cheating with, someone engaging in infidelity can feel uncomfortable behaving intimately with a girlfriend because it runs counter to their cheating behavior.

Unless he’s a total sociopath, he probably still has feelings for you, and that will make him feel guilty. Showing loving behavior toward you when he’s cheating on you would make him feel even worse.

MORE: 7 Telltale Signs He’s Not in Love Anymore

5. Avoids having sex with you … or wants it all the time

Sex is a form of intimacy, so if he’s avoiding sex with you it could tie into the previous point.

However, he could also be avoiding sex with you because he’s already having enough of it with someone else. Conversely, his sexual appetite may increase because the affair is leading to a surge in testosterone. Or maybe it’s a way for him to cope with his guilt.

The key is, his sexual appetite and behavior have changed. Maybe he now has zero interest in having sex, or maybe he now has a voracious appetite for sex. Watch out for changes in his normal patterns.

MORE: Top 10 Signs He’s Losing Interest in You

6. He hasn’t taken his online dating profile down

While you closed your account the second you became official … you notice he never did. Or maybe he did, but you noticed it recently became reactivated. Or maybe someone you know stumbled upon him on a dating app …

A man who isn’t looking to cheat will not leave his profile up once you’re official, and if he takes it down when you do, he definitely won’t reactivate it later. This is a clear sign he’s already cheating, or at the very least wants to.

Does he have a dating app on his phone that wasn’t there before, or when you ask him to delete it you notice it’s still there weeks later? These are not the signs of a man who wants to be faithful.

MORE: Is He a Cheater? 

7. He suddenly needs a lot of privacy

 

Everybody needs a certain amount of privacy, and people can be different about how much of it they need. Some people are fine with sharing their email passwords or leaving their Facebook pages open, others are not. The point is, he won’t be one way and then suddenly change without good reason.

If he used to keep his phone unlocked all the time and leave it on the table when he left the room, and now it’s always locked and he takes it with him, or he used to leave his accounts open when he walked away from the computer and now he’s signing out first, there’s a reason.

Privacy about his personal space is important too. If he used to want to have you around right when he got off from work, and now he wants to go right to the bedroom for “me” time or a shower first, this could be a sign he’s cheating.

In the end, relationships are about openness and sharing. You are working toward sharing a life together. If it felt like he was open and sharing before but now he’s suddenly shutting you out, it’s a huge red flag.

MORE: Top 6 Relationship Red Flags

8. Hides his finances

While he used to leave his credit card statements or his phone bills out in the open, he’s suddenly very stealthy with all statements and receipts. If he’s spending money on someone new, he won’t want you to notice and question it.

If you do happen to see receipts or statements, have his spending habits changed? A man who’s cheating is probably going to be spending more, whether for new clothes for himself, gifts for the woman he’s cheating with, or dinners out or even trips together. He won’t want you to know, so he’ll try to hide his finances when he used to be totally open about them.

MORE:Guy Confession: Why I Cheated

9.  He picks fights with you

If he’s started seeming angry with you all the time and you don’t know why, it could be because he feels bad and wants to turn you into the bad guy to alleviate his guilt.

Is he being hypercritical? Nitpicking about every little thing you do that irritates him? He might be trying to focus on any trait of yours that could supply him with a justification for cheating, no matter how slim.

If you’re wonderful, then he’ll feel terrible about betraying you, but if he can turn you into someone awful and make that a reason for him to cheat, on some level, it might make him feel a little bit better.

MORE: Why Do Men Lie? The 4 True Reasons 

10. He has major mood swings

A new relationship can be exciting and fun, but it can also cause anxiety. If your man is cheating, he might be happy and upbeat one minute, somber and depressed the next.

Maybe he’ll become euphoric at the opportunity of a rendezvous with the other woman, then let down when they’re unable to communicate for some reason. Or he’ll feel ecstatic one moment about her, then horribly guilty the next because of you.

A person who’s cheating is unlikely to have totally stable moods because the pull of having an affair is the excitement, the wild ups and downs. And there are all the mixed emotions- the excitement, the guilt, the confusion, the uncertainty of where to go next (stay with you or be with her). It will be very hard for him to hide this from you.

11. He gets overly defensive when you ask if he’s cheating

If he’s not cheating and you express concern, he’s not going to get really angry right off the bat. I’m not saying he won’t be hurt at the suggestion, or insulted that you would think that about him, but he won’t immediately fly off the handle and attack you. If he does, he definitely doth protest too much.

This goes for if it’s the first time you ask if he’s cheating, of course. If you were cheated on in the past and this is a big issue for you and you’re constantly accusing him of cheating, eventually it can make any man angry and defensive. But if this is the first time you’ve mentioned it and he goes ballistic, this is indicative of a guy who is truly guilty.

Of course, a guy who isn’t cheating is going to deny it. But that will be more of a genuine denial. When his denial seems dramatic and over-the-top, it’s because he’s putting on a performance.

MORE: 6 Not-So-Obvious Signs He’s Cheating on You

12. He stops saying “I love you”

Again, the guilt! A man who’s cheating will probably not be comfortable showing you affection and engaging in loving gestures like holding hands and hugging you, and this goes for his words as well.

If he’s normally vocal about saying I love you and giving you compliments, and those three words are no longer said and the compliments have dried up, it means he’s distancing himself emotionally from you.

This can be because he’s emotionally involved with someone else, or if the someone he’s seeing is just for pure sex, it could mean he still loves you and the fact that he’s cheating makes him feel guilty. He’s betraying you but doesn’t want to betray you with his words by saying things that don’t match up with his actions, because it makes him feel worse.

MORE: How to Tell If You’ve Got a Cheating Spouse

13. His daily routine suddenly changes

This can tie into some of the other signs here. Have his work hours changed noticeably? Maybe he’s staying later, or maybe he’s going in earlier so he can leave earlier but still come home at the same time, leaving his afternoons free to see someone new.

Or maybe he’s getting up early to hit the gym, or working through lunch instead of spending it with you. A change in his daily routine could be as simple as that he used to call you every day at lunch, or when he was on his way home from work, but he no longer does.

People are creatures of habit. When you’ve been with someone for a while, you become familiar with those habits. If all of a sudden he’s adopting an entirely new routine, something is up.

14. You smell another woman on him

 

It doesn’t have to be a perfume that’s not yours (although that’s a pretty significant tell!); maybe you smell cigarettes when he doesn’t smoke, or a new body wash that’s not from your shower. If he seems to have freshly showered at odd times, he could be trying to wash the smell of her off of him.

Do you see lipstick stains on his clothing in a shade you would never wear? It’s hard if not impossible to hide all the evidence of cheating, especially sensitive stuff like this.

15. You feel it in your gut

If you have a terrible suspicion your man is cheating on you, there’s a reason. If you used to trust him and feel completely secure in your relationship but now his behavior is causing you to worry, you need to trust your instincts and not sweep things under the rug.

What to Do If You Think He’s Cheating

The fact that you’re wondering if he’s cheating on you is your first crucial sign. Something made you worry. You need to trust your gut!

Now think about the rest of the items on this list. If he’s doing a few of them, it could be a coincidence. Maybe he’s taking extra care with his appearance because he’s in a new position at work and needs to dress to impress, which could also explain why he’s working late so much.

But if he’s doing more than 5 of these things … then something is definitely up.

Either he’s losing interest in you and possibly gaining interest in someone new, or he’s already got someone new and started cheating on you.

You can’t have a healthy relationship if you’re paranoid and suspicious, whether your suspicions are justified or not. Trust is essential, and trust is what you need to focus on. Think about the positive things you can do to turn the tide, to increase the trust between you.

When it comes to dealing with the man you love possibly cheating on you, what you need to understand is that you can’t control what he’s doing, you can only control how you choose to respond to it.  Unless you know for sure he’s already cheated, then distrusting him, blaming him, or punishing him are not the right way to go.

Instead, what you want to do is consider why he may be thinking of cheating. This is not to say that if he wants to cheat you are the one to blame! It’s to say that relationships take two, and a person totally happy and satisfied in a relationship is generally not going to look elsewhere.

So if his attention seems to be wandering and you’ve noticed some of these signs, start thinking about why he fell in love with you, to begin with and bring that energy back into the relationship.

Don’t berate him for attending too many happy hours or staying too late at work or going on too many business trips. Instead, try to carve out special time together. Suggest going on some of his trips with him, if possible. Be supportive.

But if you’re bringing positive energy into the relationship and he’s still treating you badly, if the trust feels like it’s completely gone or if you’re pretty sure he’s already cheated, you need to think about walking away. Remember that you can’t control his behavior, but you can control yours.

I hope this article gave you clarity on your situation. If your guy is cheating, my heart goes out to you and I hope you are able to make the right decision in regards to what to do next. Before a guy cheats, you may notice he starts to pull away or lose interest. If that’s something you’re going through, then you need to read this next: If He’s Pulling Away, Do This…

HOW TO MAKE A MAN FALL IN LOVE

If you’re searching for how to make a man fall in love with you, I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that you might be on your way to falling in love with him.

Am I right?

You’re falling fast for this guy, and you can only hope that he feels the same, but how can you ensure that he is?

In this article, you’re not going to find a bunch of ways to trick a man into falling in love with you. That’s not how I operate. What you will find are strategies for how to make a man fall in love with you that I have seen work firsthand.

If you’re here for the first time, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Adam LoDolce, and I have helped thousands of women find true love. I’ve worked as a dating coach for both men and women, and I’ve spoken at dozens of universities, where every single person in the audience walked away with tangible advice they could apply to dating and relationships.

So, yea, I kinda know what I’m talking about.

But don’t take it from me! Test out as many of the following strategies as you’d like and see if they work for you in learning how to make a man fall in love with you.

First, a Note on the Art of Patience

Before we get started, let me just say something about patience. If you have fallen for this guy, I understand that you’re in a vulnerable place while you wait for him to catch up with you. Does he love you? Does he love you not? You’ll do anything in your power to make him love you.

But pump the breaks a bit because if you rush things, you may blow it. Love takes time, and it comes to everyone at a different tempo.

And sometimes it doesn’t happen at all. Don’t blame yourself. If he doesn’t fall in love with you, it wasn’t meant to be. I bet if you step away, you’ll see a million reasons why that’s true.

But give him time. All his past relationship experiences, along with his personality, will impact how long it takes him. If you truly love him, you’ll wait.

17 Tips for How to Make a Man Fall in Love with You

Just like with all my dating and relationship advice, some of these tips on how to make a man fall in love with you may work better for you than others. You know yourself and what comes naturally, so apply the tips that make the most sense.

1.  Make Him Feel Needed (But Don’t Be Needy)

woman with man
Need him without being needy.

Look, I know you’re an independent woman that doesn’t need a man, but the truth is…men like to feel needed. Chalk it up to our evolutionary past of being the provider and protector in the relationship. Sure, you can kill your own spiders and change your own tire, but that doesn’t mean you have to.

If you’ve been single for a while and have become accustomed to doing everything that needs doing, this may take a little practice and letting go, but the next time you have something that you know your man would excel at, ask for help.

That’s all. Just ask for help.

Not only will you give him purpose (after all, he’s trying to win your heart too, so doing something for you is huge), but you’ll also see how nice it is to lean on someone else, to rely on him to help you. It takes the load off of you for sure.

2. Let Him Miss You

I know if you’re falling for this guy, you want to spend every waking moment with him. And maybe he wants that too. But let’s ease into that 24/7 type of relationship, shall we? Or better yet…never get to it.

Having time apart is healthy for couples. It gives you each time to do things on your own or spend time with friends (don’t be that chick who abandons her friends whenever she’s in a relationship). It gives you something to talk about when you are together. Having time apart provides balance in the relationship, and it gives you both the opportunity to miss one another.

When he misses you, he thinks about you. He thinks about his feelings for you. All good things!

3.  Compliment Him…Only if He Deserves It

Okay, to be clear, I am not suggesting you kiss this guy’s ass all the time.

“Oh Bobby! That shirt looks amaaazing on you.”

“Oh Bobby! You’re so strong!”

“Oh Bobby! I don’t know what I’d do without you!”

Not what we’re going for. What I do want you to do is be free with the compliments. If you’re thinking in your head that he looks hot in that shirt, tell him! I’m not sure why it is, but most of us don’t compliment other people far enough, even when we’re thinking complimentary things.

But think about how awesome you feel when someone compliments you. Why wouldn’t you want to make the guy you care so much about feel that great? So whenever something positive sprouts up in your brain about how he looks, something witty he says, or something he’s done, let him know you appreciate it.

4. Let Your True Nature Shine

I’ve heard some so-called dating gurus tell women to dumb down their intellect or put a damper on their exuberant personalities. This is utter crap. If you do that, then the guy has one impression of who you are that is entirely inaccurate. Once you get to know each other and you start being real, he might be thrown off when he discovers that, whoa, you’re actually intelligent or opinionated.

The right guy will love you for who you are.

That’s right. No need to pretend your IQ isn’t off the charts, or that you’re not a control freak. Let your control or otherwise freak flag fly. That way, he knows exactly what he’s getting into from the start. If he’s into it? Great. He’ll be that much more likely to fall in love with you.

5. Admire His Masculinity

masculinity

Just like men like to be needed, they also like it when you admire how masculine they are. But again, I’m not saying you need to squeeze his muscles and faint every time you see him!

Masculinity isn’t just about testosterone and muscles. It’s about treating people well, being chivalrous, and acting with honor. Like the Norman Mailer quote above says.

Real masculinity is being vulnerable and empathetic. It’s being a good partner. So whatever it means to you, let him know that you admire these qualities. If nothing else, it will start an interesting dialogue on what it means to be a man in this day and age.

6. Be Patient

I talked about the importance of being patient as part of the process of learning how to make a man fall in love with you, but I can’t say enough about it.

If you feel like you’ll explode if you don’t profess your love for him, heed this advice.  Tell a friend how you feel. She’ll support you but also help you analyze whether your lovegush will be reciprocated or not. If she doesn’t feel like he’s exhibiting the signs of being in love with you yet, she’ll tell you and you can save yourself from the embarrassment of a one-sided love profession (the worst!).

I’m not saying the man always has to be the one to say “I love you” first, but you do want to give him time to process his feelings on the subject. Just think how much better it would be if, when the pronouncement does happen, regardless of who says it first, you both say it.

If you rush this, you may be disappointed. Keep that in mind.

If you’re still desperate to let someone know, journal about it. This will help you process your feelings. And it never hurts to sit on them for a while. In the early stages of a relationship, it can sometimes be difficult to discern between love and lust, so by giving your love time to marinate, you can be 100% sure that it is love before you make yourself vulnerable.

7.  Let Him Know You’re Thinking of Him

I know in the early days of dating a new guy, you might try to have a poker face. After all, you aren’t sure if this is going to turn into a relationship, so you might be hesitant to tell him that you’re thinking of him.

Well, the rules have changed now that things are progressing, and it’s actually in your favor to tell him he’s on your mind. Just like with compliments, if you like it, he will too. You blush from your head to your toe whenever he tells you that he’s thinking of you, so why not reciprocate? Here are a few texts you could send to make him smile.

Saw a corgi today [his favorite dog] and it made me think of you!

Sigh. I can’t get any work done today. Just keep replaying our last date…

Just wanted to say hi, since you’re on my mind!

None of these are overboard. They’re just little pings to tell him that you’re thinking about him. They’ll make him smile, I guarantee!

8. Be Supportive of His Interests and Efforts

Look, you don’t have to suddenly feign an interest in disc golf, rock climbing, or fishing if you’re not already into them, but if your guy has hobbies or interests, one way to successfully learn how to make a man fall in love with you is to be supportive.

If he goes on a fishing trip, ask what he caught. If he’s going to the rock climbing gym, ask how his workout went. You’re not pretending you’re all about these interests; you’re just showing that you respect that he’s got things he’s into, and you’re inquiring about them.

A scientific study showed that people like people who ask questions, particularly followup questions. Followup questions show that you’re paying attention and that you’re genuinely interested. So don’t stop with simply asking him how that fishing trip went. If he tells you that he caught a tuna, ask him what fresh tuna tastes like. Ask who he went fishing with. Ask what kind of bait he uses. Especially if you don’t know a lot about his hobby, he’d be happy to teach you if you’re express curiosity.

Likewise, be supportive of what he’s doing. If you know he’s got a job interview this week, send a text beforehand letting him know you’re rooting for him, then check in with him after to see how it went. One of the foundations of a loving relationship is support; when you show your partner that you’re there for him as his biggest cheerleader, he feels great. And when you support him, you’re starting to glom onto how to make a man fall in love with you.

9. Don’t Try to Change Him

couple arguing
If you want to change him, you’re off to a bad start.

I totally love Chip…except his excessive drinking habit.

He’s completely right for me…if only he didn’t yell at waiters when they get his order wrong.

Sure, you’re going to have a few things that might get on your nerves with this guy, but they shouldn’t be dealbreakers. You can’t think that down the road you will break him of whatever annoying habit he’s got. You can never, ever change a man. Seriously.

If there are issues big enough to make you hesitate when you think about a future with this guy, he’s not right for you. Let him go. You’ll be better off in the long run.

Men who are with women who constantly make suggestions for how they could be better tend to close off from them. So pay attention to what you’re saying to him. If you’re sending him a constant barrage of “you should…” messaging, pull back, or you’ll lose him. Instead, embrace him with all his quirks. He’ll do the same with you.

10. Listen (REALLY) When He Talks

While it’s easy to talk, it’s a lot harder to listen…I mean really listen. Not half listening to your guy on the phone while you paint your toenails and browse social media.

When you put all your energy into hearing what he’s saying, you are actually listening on two levels: on the first, you’re hearing his words, but you’re also taking in what he’s communicating nonverbally. And since 60-80% of our communication is nonverbal,  this is incredibly important to pick up on, especially if you want to learn how to make a man fall in love with you madly.

When he says his day is “fine,” what is his body language saying? Is he nervously fidgeting? If so, he may want to go more into his day but wants you to ask more questions. Is he sad when he talks? Dive into why with more followup. Repeat what you understand him to have said to show that you’re paying attention.

11. Show Him You Appreciate Him

Here’s another one of those tips for how to make a man fall in love with you that falls under that whole “do unto others” thing. Think about how you feel when your man brings your favorite grande quadruple shot coconut milk latte on your coffee break at work. That little gesture shows you that he cares for and appreciates you.

What can you do to show that you appreciate him?

Think about ways you can make his life easier. Maybe he’s super busy, so you pick up his dry cleaning or walk his dog.

Maybe he’s been stressed lately, so you fill the bedroom with candles and treat him to an hour-long massage.

Find ways to make him smile.

Stick a love note in his laptop bag. Bring him breakfast in bed.

Tell him thank you for no reason other than for him being his wonderful self. The more you show your appreciation, the more he’ll feel your love…and start to feel his own for you.

12. Let Him Make You Laugh

Sara scowls whenever her boyfriend Tyrone tells a joke at a party. She feels he’s trying to get too much attention for himself. Tyrone is crushed that she doesn’t think he’s funny.

Lindsay laughs so hard at Scott’s jokes that milk shoots out of her nose. She’s always introducing him as her “hilarious boyfriend.”

Which guy do you think is more likely to fall in love?

I’m not suggesting you fake laugh at all of his jokes. But if he’s funny, let him make you laugh. Having a similar sense of humor is important for a long-lasting and loving relationship. If you love that he guffaws at every one of your “that’s what she said” jokes, then reciprocate when he tells a knock-knock joke.

13. Trust Him

I know that trust doesn’t come easily if you’ve been hurt in the past. But please realize that this guy isn’t that guy. And if you want this relationship to work out, you’re going to have to trust him at some point.

Certainly, if he’s exhibiting signs that he shouldn’t be trusted, don’t ignore those. But if he’s done everything right, then let those walls around your heart down a tad.

So how do you trust him? Stop assuming you’re the only one who can do something right. Let’s say you normally do the planning for road trips, and you have one coming up with your guy. Rather than taking control, if he’s offering, put him in charge of planning it.

So what if you take a 3-hour detour to see a llama farm? The experience will be memorable. Don’t view the trip through the lens of what you would have planned but just enjoy that he put in the effort to do something for the two of you.

If the issue is him being around other women, especially if you’ve been cheated on, communicate your feelings of insecurity rather than jumping down his throat about hanging out with an old female friend from high school. Let him know that because of past experiences, it’s not easy for you to not worry about that situation. He’ll reassure you that he’s only got eyes for you, and you have to believe him rather than telling yourself that this will be another guy to hurt you.

If you have love, you have trust. You can’t have one without the other.

14. Be Independent

I have had a lot of female relationship coaching clients who, in their 20s and in their first serious relationship, pretty much gave up all friendships and interests for a guy. It wasn’t like he asked her to do it, but it’s a common thing. And when you get older, this pattern continues. If this describes you, it’s important to understand that one of the best ways to discover how to make a man fall in love with you is to be independent and keep on doing the things you love with the people you care about.

Who would you be more attracted to, a man who stopped his weekly soccer games with his buddies so he could spend every day with you…

Or the guy who kisses you before he goes to soccer practice, texts you that he’s going out for a beer afterward, and then comes back afterward to see you because he misses you?

Like I said in #2: having a little space in your relationship is healthy. And so is having things that you do on your own. Even if you just want to spend all Saturday afternoon reading by yourself, if that’s what nurtures you, that’s what’s right for the relationship. The right guy won’t have any problem with that, and in fact will be glad that you’re so independent.

Independence also means not overly relying on him. If you whine every time your grass gets tall, wanting him to do it, you’ll annoy him. There’s no reason you can’t get the mower out and mow your own grass, is there??

15. Engage Him in Intellectual Conversations

There is nothing hotter than a smart woman with an opinion. I don’t care if the media tells you otherwise; we dig it. So feel free to bring up a news article you read today to get his insight. Don’t be shy about expressing an opposing opinion. Find topics that the two of you thrive on discussing. Maybe take turns picking the subject.

Relationships can get stale when there’s no new air. Keep things constantly fresh by engaging in those intellectual conversations.

16. Don’t Be Afraid to Push Back

Again, I’ve seen dating coaches tell women to be more demure, more…soft. They tell you to agree with him. Let him make the decisions. After all, he is a MAN!

That’s bulls#^&. A man does not want a yes woman. He wants you.

So if he says he wants to see the latest bloody thriller and you hate gore, tell him. Compromise with a superhero flick.

If he says something you don’t agree with, tell him. No one said you have to have the same opinion as the man you love. If you don’t, the conversation is so much more interesting (see #15).

Pushing back is not arguing. It’s simply letting him know that you have an opinion that deserves to be honored.

17. Send Him Texts Throughout the Day

If, when you started dating, you always waited for him to initiate the texting, it’s time to change up your strategy. Nobody likes to be the only one who texts first, so make things more even by you starting half of the conversations.

They don’t even have to be conversations. A quick “Hey cutie. Thinking of you!” is enough to make him feel special and get your point across.

Conclusion:

love
Let love happen on its own time…with a little nudge from you.

You might fall in love fast. He might be slow. But once you’re there, if you use these strategies for how to make a man fall in love with you, you might speed up the process for him. I’m not suggesting you do anything other than be authentic, but do be aware of how you can communicate how much he means to you, even if you’re not yet saying those three little words.

If you’ve been in a long-term relationship before, think back and ask yourself whether you did all of these tips. I’m betting not. Maybe you never thought to compliment him or appreciate his manliness. Now’s your chance to try these out with a new guy — possibly the right guy — and see what kind of wonderful results they get.

What are your tips on how to make a man fall in love with you? Share them in the comments below so other Sexy Confident members can take notes!

Commitment is part of how to get a man to fall in love with you. Check out my Casual to Committed webinar, and I guarantee you’ll be on the right path to true love!

 

37 WAYS TO MAKE A WOMAN FALL IN LOVE

37 Ways To Make A Girl Fall In Love With You

how to make a girl fall in love with you

There’s no magic formula to cure a broken heart, that’s for sure. On the flip side, there isn’t a love potion that I know of that’s going to make someone fall for you.

What you can do is increase the odds you will get the girl you want by following these expert and practically proven tips.

HOW TO MAKE A GIRL FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU

1. OPEN YOUR EARS

Girls like a man that’s going to listen to their problems and when you open your ears and let them talk, you are one step up on any other guy in pursuit. Make sure you don’t push her to make a decision. She just wants you to listen so she can work it out.

Of course if she asks for your advice, you should give it. Just make sure you aren’t pushing too hard with it or she’ll close the door fast.

2. GIVE HER COMPLIMENTS

Who doesn’t like a nice compliment now and then? Just please don’t give her fake praise or she will kick your butt to the curb fast. Make sure the compliment is genuine and sincere and not too deep.

If you overdo it, I can guarantee this pointer will backfire big time.

Flatter her a little and she will reward you handsomely.

3. SUPPORT HER ROYALLY

Think of this like you might a cheerleader. You need to show her you will be there to encourage her on and support her in her daily battles. This doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything she does and says, that would make you a pushover puppet.

However, you should show her you appreciate and respect her for her life choices. That’s just plain magical in the dating game.

4. DON’T BE AFRAID TO PLAY THE CHIVALRY CARD

This is where you are going to capture her attention and rock her world. Too many guys today seem to forget their manners. When you treat a lady properly, it will never ever go out of style.

Open the door for her. Pull out her chair. Give her your coat on a chilly evening.

When you show her she’s worth being treated specially, you will be squeezing your way into her heart for all the right reasons. Give it a shot! You’ve got nothing to lose.

5. GIVE HER ALL OF YOUR ATTENTION

I know this one isn’t so easy considering the technology we’ve got to our fingertips. If you are serious about showing this girl you deserve to have her fall in love with you, then you need to keep all eyes on her.

This means putting your phone away and definitely not watching other girls walk into the room.

You will come across as a prick if you can’t give her your full attention. The choice is yours.

6. TELL HER HOW MUCH YOU ENJOY SPENDING TIME WITH HER

This can come in all sorts of different shapes and forms. You can tell her face to face that you really enjoy hanging out with her. Another route is to drop her a text or email to make sure she knows that she’s on your mind.

Or you can drop her a line on social media. You just want to make it crystal clear that you like being with her. She needs to know that if you are going to be successful making her fall in love with you.

7. NURTURE THE LOVE

You need to stand out and in order to do this, you’ve got to take care of the little things. Give her flowers or some sort of surprise just because. Don’t wait until a special occasion to show her how you feel.

This will help to make her feel loved and appreciated and that’s a direct route to making her fall in love with you. End of story.

8. MR. CLEAN IS A GOOD THING

Truth be told, if you are leaving your dirty socks on the floor and the sink filled with your dishes, you are killing the romance.

Girls like it clean and that means you need to make every effort to clean up after yourself and not leave it to her, no matter what she says.

You should know by now that girls say one thing and mean another more often than not.

Like it or lump it because that’s just the way it is.

9. MUSIC MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDER

There’s just something about a man that sings. Girls go crazy over it. Guess there’s just something about a bad boy rock star. This doesn’t mean you have to be a rocker to get a girl. But if you’ve got some singing skills in your back pocket, that’s a good thing.

If not, just show her you are passionate in some other genre. Passion is perfect when combined with love.

10. FUNNY IS IN

When you show a girl you can be light hearted and funny, you are one step closer to getting her walls down so you can jump in.

Laughter is the best medicine and when you show a girl you can be funny, or at least try, you will get into her heart and mind fast.

So let loose and get a little silly if you are serious about getting the girl for keeps.

11. PLAY IT COOL

The very last thing a girl wants is a high strung man that just can’t play it cool. If you show her you’ve got the innate ability to diffuse spicy situations and shrug off the small things, you are going to show her straight up she’d be crazy not to fall in love with you.

Just trust me on this one please.

12. CONNECT WITH FRIENDS AND FAMILY

You are certified crazy if you don’t think this girls friends and family aren’t going to influence her decision to open up to you or not.

If you can get in the good books with her loved ones, she will get the encouragement she needs to fall in love with you.

Let her family and friends work for you in your quest. Having an outside source tell you that you should be with a guy really is magical.

13. KEEP IT POSITIVE

If you don’t have anything nice to say about her friends and family, make sure you keep it to yourself. One of the worst things you can do is dish the people she loves and is connected with.

Negativity gets you nowhere fast, just saying.

14. STEP AWAY FROM TIME TO TIME

The last thing you want to do is show this special girl that you have nothing but her. That makes you out to be needy and insecure and that’s definitely not what you want.

Sure, it’s important that you show her she is special to you. But you don’t need to make her your everything just yet. Take the time to hang out with other people and that alone will make her fall hard for you.

That just forces her to work for your attention and that’s needed in the relationship world.

15. SLOW AND STEADY DOES WIN THE RACE

Life is often way too fast. We are always so busy wanting to do more in less time. Take a step back from time to time and slow the pace. Turn the music up and give her a slow dance whenever you feel the urge.

That’s just romantically thoughtful and she will love it on every level.

16. TIMING IS VITAL

When you are on time, you are showing her that you respect her time. Just don’t show up late for a date, no matter what. Of course there are the inevitable that pop up and make it pretty much impossible for you to be on time, but they should be the exception to the rules.

Do whatever it takes to make sure you are punctual and that magic will unfold.

17. FAMILY IS VIP

When you make the time to introduce her to your family, you are showing her that she is special to you. And when you are trying to make her fall in love with you, that’s golden.

Show her off to your family and be sure to treat your family with love and respect so she can see how you will treat her in the long run.

Makes perfect sense.

18. SURPRISES ARE MAGICAL

When you take the time to surprise her, you will win your way into her heart. Shoot her a message at work to let her know you are thinking about her. Leave her a voicemail or note in her purse to make her smile.

This just reiterates the fact you are a thoughtful man that deserves her attention.

19. BE CARING

This goes without saying but when she is feeling under the weather, you need to show her you’ll take care of her. Make her soup or bring her a box of Kleenex. Do whatever you need to in order to help her feel better quickly and get back on her feet.

This is the sort of thing that shows a girl it’s about time she fell in love. Hard and fast works.

20. TOP NOTCH HYGIENE

This one is a given. If you are serious about getting a girl to fall head over heels for you, then you need to make certain you never leave the house unless you are showered, shaved, and smelling like a million bucks.

21. START TALKING

It’s natural to feel nervous around a beautiful girl. Just chill! If you allow your anxiety to get the best of you, then you might as well write the love thing off now.

Drop your guard and muster up the courage to just go talk with her. Trust me, it will be appreciated.

22. SLIP PAST THE NASTY SHIELD

More often than not, a pretty woman is witchy first when a guy gives them a compliment. Think of it as a defensive shield that’s essential to keep the pricks out.

Think about it for a minute. When a girl is hit on by oodles of guys, she’s got to figure out a way to deflect them right?

Just turn up the charm and show her you are more interesting than all the other guys. She’ll bite if it’s meant to be.

23. CONNECT WITH HER ENTOURAGE

No doubt a woman’s friends will naturally protect her from any man they believe is bad news. This means if you are ugly, creepy or just plain rude, you don’t stand a chance.

So you’ve either got to get into the good books fast or bring some eye candy with you to keep them oogling. Cute guys should do the trick keeping them busy while you go in and at least get her number.

Time to step up to the plate and whack a homer if you really want to make that girl fall in love with you.

24. TAKE ACTION TO PLAY BOTH SIDES OF THE FENCE

This is a tough one to master but where there’s a will, there’s a way!

You need to both play hard to get and show her you like her. When you balance this tightrope perfectly, it will help you win the prize.

25. CREATE THE PERFECT TEXT

Be careful here because girls tend to naturally over analyze text messages. In other words, they put them under the microscope and often make them into more than they really are. You’ve got your work cut out for you.

Think of all the texts she gets each day and your focus is to make yours stand out. Open your mind and think outside the box. Keep it short and sweet and memorable. Do that and your headed in the right direction.

26. BECOME AN EXPERT IN HITTING BACK

No worries, I’m referring to texting. When your girl shoots you a text, you need to make every effort within reason, to send one right back to her. Think tennis here.

The length of your shot and the timing is critical. Pay attention to every shot you take if you want to end up winning the girl.

27. DIVE INTO THE ROMANCE

If you want a woman to love you, then you are going to have to show her. What better way than to take the time to create a super romantic date?

Think of what she likes and appreciates and build from there. Make sure there’s some flirting and fun and lots going on so boredom has zero chance of getting into the picture.

Nail this one and you’ll get to nail her too, if you haven’t already.

28. SET UP FOLLOWUPS

If you want to keep the love momentum rolling, you’re going to need to set up more dates. Don’t expect her to give it up or become totally comfortable with you until at a least the 3rd or 4th date.

In other words, you’ve got to work for it. And when you give her something to look forward to down the road, you are showing her you’ve got a vested interest in her and that’s magical.

Keep her busy and you are the only one she will have time to focus on. Need I say more?

29. GREAT LOVEMAKING IS ESSENTIAL

Of course this depends on where you are in building your relationship. Something you don’t ever want to forget is you need to make amazing love to her. This means lots of kissing and cuddling and not running out the door shortly after.

If you do that, you’ll make her feel cheap and used and there’s seriously no love in that scenario.

Slow and steady wins the race. The longer, the better.

30. BE PATIENT FOR “WHAT ARE WE?”

If you are serious about making this girl fall for you, she needs to be the one pushing to know where you stand. When she asks this question, it’s time to make sure you solidify the fact you are her boyfriend and you want to take your relationship to the next level.

Step by step you will get there if you play your cards right.

31. DEAL WITH HER IMPERFECTIONS

No matter how hot you think she is, everyone has imperfections. If she gets a little emotionally crazy, just deal with it. When she decides she doesn’t want to wear makeup, you better support her.

And no matter what, you are best to ignore your innate need to flirt with other women. Just don’t please.

32. TELL HER YOU LOVE HER

This is a tough one for many guys because it makes you vulnerable and opens the door to possible rejection.

Usually, it’s the girl that says the L word first but not always.

Put it all out there and tell her you love her and she’s going to fall head over heels in love with you.

33. SHE’S GOT TO FEEL OUT OF CONTROL

If you want a woman to fall for you, then you need to gain the power hand in the relationship. Keep in mind if you are chasing her like a weak puppy, she will get bored with you fast.

You need to get her chasing you a little and your love will be golden.

34. ELUSIVE TAKES THE CAKE

The guy needs to be the one that starts and finishes communication. She needs to be the one reaching out to you and you can get back to her here and there.

Make sure she knows she isn’t your everything. But on the flip side, she still needs to feel important.

Be elusive but don’t overdo it. If you aren’t ever there for her, there’s no way she can fall in love with you.

35. BE MYSTERIOUS

You don’t have to answer every question she asks. In fact, when you are a little vague or mysterious, you are going to draw her in for more. When a girl’s curiosity is peaked, she will look for ways to peel your layers and gain more connection.

You can take it from here.

36. CREATE ADDICTION

When you can become her addiction or better yet obsession, you’ve just sealed the deal. Never forget that girls are great at playing the game so you need to be wary and cautious.

In order for you to create addiction, you need to drop off the radar from time to time and master the art of slipping back in unannounced.

37. CHALLENGING IS GOOD

We all like a challenge. Keep in mind, as humans, we always want what we don’t have. Use this to your advantage.

Don’t be afraid to challenge her and be a challenge. It will help you make her fall for you pronto.

FINAL WORDS

When you are figuring out how to make a girl fall in love with you, there are oodles of factors to consider. Take each of these tips, tricks and pointers into consideration and follow her lead. Show her your confidence and create a plan to make her crazy about you.

You can do it.

Best of Luck!